Flip the Script-A Personal Challenge

God has been challenging me a lot in the area of my perspective lately. It can be natural for me to initially view things with a slightly melancholic twist. Whether it is a situation in my life, a problem another person is having, or something I am unsure about, I struggle with a first response that sees things as more of a “problem” than an “opportunity”.

In the last few years God’s been putting his finger on this area of my life. He’s been challenging my thinking, using difficulties I’ve faced to improve and mature me-rather than to deplete me. He’s allowed me to go through trials, on large and small scales, and used them to shape and mature me in my faith and in my calling. He’s taken my initial “melancholic” reaction to things and allowed me to see his hand in using a “problem” as something to bring about positivity and change in an area.

Rather than seeing issues that arise as problems, He has been helping me to seize them as opportunities. Yes, when things come up they can be frustrating, and I may feel an immediate sense of annoyance, anger or discouragement. However, He has been challenging and retraining my thinking to begin see every PROBLEM as an OPPORTUNITY for growth and improvement.

It is through God’s graces that we mature in our faith-and often, it’s the “issues” we encounter that are his greatest tools. I love how many leaders in history have learned and applied this lesson-saying:

•   “Opportunity? Often it comes in the form of misfortune, or temporary defeat."  Napoleon Hill

• “A pessimist sees the difficulty in every opportunity; an optimist sees the opportunity in every difficulty” Sir Winston Churchill

• "We are continually faced by great opportunities brilliantly disguised as insoluble problems." Anonymous
•  “Trouble is only opportunity in work clothes” Henry J Kaiser

The last quote by Henry J Kaiser is definitely my favorite. I’ve found that when “problems” present themselves it’s actually just a God given tool to get me to work in an area. Sometimes a problem highlights an area I need to work on within myself, or they may highlight an area where our family needs to get better or make a change. Other times, God uses problems in areas of a team or system where growth and discipleship needs to take place. Whatever it may be, there is always a chance to get better, stronger, and wiser in every problem we face.

The Bible tells us to essentially CELEBRATE our problems, saying in James 1:2-4 “2 Consider it pure joy, my brothers, whenever you face trials of many kinds, 3 because you know that the testing of your faith develops perseverance. 4 Perseverance must finish its work so that you may be mature and complete, not lacking anything.”

Today I am reminded that the “problems” I face are not necessarily “problems” at all. Rather, when I submit them to God and seek wisdom from him, they are actually OPPORTUNITIES he’s using to give me MORE than I already have (and not to be lacking in anything). So today I am challenged to flip the script-and see a problem as a tool in God’s hands to make something even better.

Divine Appointments

“Blessed are those who listen to Me, watching daily at my doors,waiting at my doorway. For those who find me, find life and receive favor from the LORD.” (Proverbs 8:34-35)

Today I felt the blessing, favor and love of the Lord over my life. I was reminded today that he orchestrates my steps and that He is divinely protecting me-without me fully realizing it.

During a recent breakfast meeting I’d had with an incredible volunteer couple from our church, I started to feel uncomfortable and a bit of burning and itching. I was hoping it was just due to the new sunscreen I’d used for the first time that am. I ignored it, trying to focus on the conversation at hand, but the feeling did not go away. After a little bit my arms got itchy, and, I could not resist scratching. I looked down and there were red and white blotches all over my skin. The couple I was meeting with asked if I was feeling ok, to which I responded “Is my face kind of red?” They said yes, and so were my chest and arms. It was obvious I was having SOME kind of allergic to something; I just didn’t know what. They then asked a very unusual question which was “Are you allergic to Niacin?” My first response was an immediate “No” as to be quite honest I didn’t know what Niacin was or if I was taking it. They asked if my health drink had Niacin in it and I shared it couldn’t be that as I’d been drinking this for months and never had a reaction. I then went to the next logical things-either the Sweet and Low I’d used in my coffee, or my new sunscreen. Eventually it went away and I haven’t thought anything of it since.

This morning I began to experience the same sensation as before, but much more severely.  I tried to keep focused on working, but, the burning was moving at a frightening speed and pain level throughout my entire body was pretty bad. After a few minutes of feeling like my entire body was on fire I went downstairs to ask my husband if I looked funny. He said I looked red, and gave me two Bendaryl right away.  To pass the time but be near someone else, I began to open the mail. FINALLY, after a year of frustration and attempts at getting our health care worked out, I had the response for details of our recently approved insurance in my hands!

I cheered in excitement but began to realize my level of discomfort was starting to make me nervous. I went upstairs to check in the mirror and realized my ENTIRE body was bright red, blotchy, and tingling with a vengeance that made me scared. I started to notice a shortness of breath that was settling in, and, started to panic about whether my throat was closing in on me.  I yelled down to John that we were going to the hospital. Once in the car I began to google “allergic reaction to Niacin” based off of my previous conversation with Frank and Char. This is what I found:

Seek medical attention right away if any of these SEVERE side effects occur when using Niacin:

Severe allergic reactions (rash; hives; itching; difficulty breathing; tightness in the chest; swelling of the mouth, face, lips, or tongue; unusual hoarseness); black, tarry, or bloody stools; changes in vision (eg, cloudy or blurred vision); fainting; fast or irregular heartbeat; flu-like symptoms

I realized right then that the Lord was directing my very footsteps, and, that I was indeed having all of the obvious symptoms of an allergic reaction to Niacin. 

When I got home, however, I realized a few things:

•  God knew, before I did, that something like this was going to happen

• ·God set up the timing of my first reaction and gave the Spencers the insight to ask as to whether I was allergic to Niacin (of all the things!)

• God orchestrated the very DAY and TIME I’d receive my medical information  

• God used this incident to get me to stop using the products/vitamins that I was allergic to (and yes, they were the ones that had Niacin in them)

 He showed me, yet again, that he was watching over me.This was a great reminder that often he is working behind the scenes, orchestrating the details, without us even realizing it is Him. We serve such an amazing God, I am so thankful today (even if I had to turn in my “I’m not allergic to anything” card!)

Life Rhythms

I just read a blog by a great writer Alicia Britt Chole in which this basic statement challenged everything about the way I’ve been living my day to day life as of recently. She shared these thoughts in her blog http://blog.truthportraits.com/2010/03/on-multi-tasking-and-silence.html

"For years I've been intentionally simplifying, living less thickly, with fewer overlapping responsibilities...it helps build up a margin of strength to call upon in full seasons like this one. As a discipline, over the years I have been choosing to multi-task less."

Oh how counter cultural-and lovely-this concept sounds!!!  This seems so inviting, yet, it’s not something I’ve felt I “could” choose for myself.  I often feel like I’m spinning from one thing to the next, yet when I read this statement I had to ask myself if I am the one responsible for wiring MYSELF to live this way. If I am tired, burned out, or frustrated, am I, not my circumstances or life stage- the one responsible for this???  The second question, which I haven’t dug into yet, is if this “busyness” is a mask to cover a lack of faith on my part? When I try to take care of  EVERY THING (emphasis on the two words) with my own strength, is this an indicator of me not trusting for anything to be “left over” and given into the hands of a far more capable God?

I am not a sociologist, but I am intrigued and fascinated by the way people around the world can live and structure their lives so differently from one another. It seems common to find entire cultural groups of people who can go from one extreme to the next. Some entire people groups are frazzled beyond repair, and others seem to have found a great way to live in what I call the “rhythm” of their life with peace and calm. I recall a great woman of God saying that our busyness was really “ the spirit of the age.” As we talked more about this she explained that it’s our spiritual enemy, the Devil, who wants to keep us busy- so distracted that we won’t notice the time in which we live, the more important things which are before us. We forget the scope of eternity and the scope of what really matters in this lifetime. The “important stuff” gets hidden behind all of the “small” stuff that keeps us so busy-“the spirit of the age.”

My theory is that every family, regardless of what its individual make up is, has an ability to create its own “rhythm.”  This rhythm, when it’s good, means things “feel” good in the home. The important pieces are in place, the house is in order spiritually, emotionally, physically, mentally and financially (even if there is not “enough” money what is there is still being ordered, considered, and accounted for in God’s ways). As one who has been first a non-believer, and later a believer, I am convinced this harmonious “rhythm” can exist for every individual, every family. I am most convinced that it’s nearly impossible to achieve this without the help of God.   

With God’s help today I chose to prioritize myself, to order my life around these basic priorities, in this order:

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I am a child of God….I chose to spend time with Him before any other earthly distraction takes it away from me. I chose to be still, to seek his Word, to seek Him, first.

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I am a wife….I chose to take time to love my husband, to express love and encouragement towards my husband, and to be refreshed and a great partner to him.

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I am a mom…I chose to be filled with the Spirit of God, to have and express love and companionship with my husband for my child to see . I do this because I know that these things will also encourage and strengthen my child. I chose to stop what I am doing throughout my day to simply focus on my child, to give him my attention, adoration and my non- distracted attention. I chose not to become frustrated when these opportunities arise at times that are not “convenient” for me...they never are.

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I am a leader….I chose as a spiritual leader to say “no” to taking on too much. I do this to keep my life  in spiritual health and order. I do this so when the time to truly lead presents itself I can do so with the guidance and help of the Holy Spirit –and not my own wisdom and strength (which is never right or enough).  I chose not to try to plan and prepare to meet every need, and do everything right “now.” I do this because I trust that this is God’s church we lead, not our own, and I have a core belief that he can do things with far more excellence, and sufficiency, than I ever could.  I chose to remember that my self proclaimed“emergencies” of the “urgent” are not always so urgent to God.

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I am a part of the body of Christ-locally and globally…I chose to let the overflow from the above things be a blessing and an encouragement to those around me. I chose to allow the overflow of my heart-my words, my actions, my attitude-to come out of a place of strength, security and faith in a good loving God. I chose to take time to understand the truths of His word and to know Him in such a way that the fruits of the Spirit overflow from me, touching the lives of those around me.

Organic Child Like Faith

A recent conversation with a mom friend prompted me to write a little bit about how we can teach our children to grow in their faith and walk with God. This friend asked me what she could do to teach her child about her faith.   It got me thinking about what things we, as parents, can do to help our children live out their faith on a daily basis.

I truly believe that the greatest indicator of what a child understands about God and their faith starts in the home, and that we, as parents, are their greatest teachers.

Here are few basic, every day ideas of how we can teach our children to love God organically in our everyday lives:

·       
Continued Prayer: Children are never too young, or too old, to engage in age appropriate forms of prayer. As parents we can pray over our babies when we rock them, feed them, or drive with them. I believe babies can sense what this is from a young age and that it brings a great calm to their spirits. As they grow older, we can pray with our children. The types of prayers are dependent on the age and development of the child-but the consistency of doing this together is what is most important. Never underestimate the power of simple prayers like grace over meals, bedtime prayers, or prayers of thankfulness. One of my favorite things to do with Aiden is to pray as we're driving together in the morning, whether it be school, church, or a friend’s house. I turn off the radio, reach my hand back to hold his (in good driving conditions) and explain to him what I’m going to pray for (church, our day, Daddy’s meeting, etc.). We close every prayer, big or small, together in the name of Jesus. I want him to learn, at a young age, the power of praying in the name of Jesus.

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            Our words: The way we speak to our children, spouses, friends and family show the ways we edify God with our mouths. We can also speak scripture into our daily situations, using those “teachable moments” to introduce Biblical concepts-big or small-to help shape their understanding of the world around them.

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Our disciplines: When we take time to pray, reflect, read the word of God, and make church a regular part of regular family life, we are teaching our kids lifestyle habits that will never leave them. Do something fun like writing a memory verse on a chalkboard or mirror in your home, leave it hanging for them to see and discuss with them over the course of the week.

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Our generosity: What we do with our resources matters. Children learn first and foremost from their parents to begin thinking beyond themselves and start using what they have for God and others.  Having conversations about why we do certain things that are not “normal” with our resources (such as tithing, giving to special projects, or cleaning out toys to give to others in need) are all ways that our children can learn how to live generous lives at a young age. We were blessed to take Aiden this Christmas to deliver presents to some of the families our church sponsored. He may not have understood fully what he was doing, but, it was a great starting point for future conversations we can have as he grows older.

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Step Out: Continue to step out in faith in your own walk with God. Allow God to direct your family in ways that you can take faith steps together and show your kids what it is to step out in faith on a daily basis. Go to a soup kitchen, give something to bless God or others with, pray with someone in need at your home, serve on a ministry team, practice hospitality towards friends and “strangers”…when you don’t get too “comfortable” in your faith your kids will see that it’s living and active in you.

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The Life Giving Principle

The Life Giving Principle

Have you ever had one of those “aha” moments where FINALLY someone has been able to articulate a thought you’ve had that you couldn’t quite put together? I had that “light bulb” moment (as Oprah calls it) this weekend at our incredible “Access Granted” pastors weekend at Next Level Church.  This was a phrase that we heard the pastors, leadership, and volunteer teams using over and over again that just stuck with me. This phrase was “life giving.” It came in contexts such as this: “we would not do that again, even though it was good, because it violated our life giving principle,” or “is this life giving” or “we want to model our life giving principle.”

The question I asked myself is WHY did this phrase stick out so much to me? Why is this so relevant? I realized, after some prayer and thinking, that it’s one of the things I am most passionate about yet never had a right type of verbage to explain it. I would use words such as being “positive” or “upbeat” but they always failed to fully explain the feeling I had towards something, someone or a situation. This phrase just nailed it on the head!

As I pondered this principle and how I can implement this into my own life, marriage, family and church I realized that these two words-life giving-are centered strongly on some of the deepest roots of Christianity. Jesus said in John 10:10”I have come that they may have life, and have it to the full...” Jesus, the very son of God, died on a cross for one purpose…to give us LIFE! He IS the principle of being life giving. So why is the church at times or believers at times so at odds with being the model of this gospel principle?  I believe it’s because they’ve missed one of the main points of the gospel-to be LIFE GIVING in all that we say and do. Yes, Jesus is the way to eternal salvation and life more abundantly here on earth-but we, as believers, are to be his living models of this in the present. It says in 2 Corinthians 5:20 (the message) “We're Christ's representatives. God uses us to persuade men and women to drop their differences and enter into God's work of making things right between them. We're speaking for God today…”

So wherever you are at today, whether you find yourselves at odds with someone, frustrated about something, or just plain worn out and tired out from the things of life, I encourage you in this. Find a way to live out this life giving principle towards those around you. Consider your speech towards or about others-is the way you're talking violate this gospel principle? Consider how can you begin, with your words and behaviors, to breathe "life" back into that relationship or situation. Whether it is easy or one of the most difficult things to do, start to implement this gospel principle of being “life giving” and you will find that another Biblical principle will come back and encourage you. Proverbs 11:25 (The Message (MSG) ²⁵ The one who blesses others is abundantly blessed; those who help others are helped.”

Seeking Wisdom

A few nights ago, on my way home from a grocery shopping trip which was I gloriously able to do all alone, I found myself singing along to an old Indigo Girls song that goes "and the less I seek my soul for some definitives, the closer I am to fine..."Okay I have to be honest, I am not a hundred percent sure that that's how the lines go, however, I have a knack for making up lyrics that are surprisingly similar to the real ones so let me know if I'm off here.

Although I don't theologically agree with all of their standpoints in this song-oh well, it's a great song to sing really loud and with gusto! I love to sing it especially loud when they say "the closer I am to fine." This song brings back old memories of being in college and singing along with friends and being goofy, of driving to a cabin in the woods with family and jamming along the way. I love how that one line and those memories always bring a smile to my face.

I started thinking about what a new stage of life I am in as I was driving along Hwy 10, singing this song out loud, groceries in the back, tired from a long day of being wife, mom, friend, pastor, housekeeper and cook all at the same time.  I find myself seeking new wisdom from God in a new season of my life that I have never encountered before. I find myself trying to "navigate life" and seeking wisdom from Him in this new part of the journey we're on.

New seasons are always fun, but they are not always easy. In fact, I believe to my core that some of the greatest rewards come with the heaviest of responsibilities. If you want an easy life there may not be as much difficulty, stress, or pain, but, there may not be as much to show for it in the end. It may even be a little "melba toast" ish as they say. It's predictable, easy, but well, it's kind of bland.

I found myself as a mommy at a new crossroads in life. Our little baby is becoming a little almost two year old toddler. He's starting to understand right from wrong, yes from no, and he's starting to try and push the limits. Of course, that just makes sense, but, that doesn't make it easy.  Which leads me to the point of this blog...

I was on a recent trip to find  a new outfit to wear at the grand opening of our church. I was so excited to go that first thing this am I got up and got myself and Aiden ready to go shopping. We were off to a good start until we entered what I would say made me the happiest woman around....Ann Taylor Loft had a 60% off of clearance sale-and the racks were FULL of some of my favorite things!!! I was off, off and away-ready to shop when suddenly Aiden started to show signs of distress...it started small, whining here and there. I was diligent at ignoring it, handing off crackers to pacify, and then when I found him half unstrapped from his stroller and tipping it over I "unleashed" him to be free as long as he stayed close to me. It actually worked...for about 60 seconds, and then he was off on his own journey into the petites section...At first I tried to explain to him we needed to go towards the other section as mommy is not in petites, however, that's where he wanted to stay. I started to steer him towards my desired area of shopping and it spiraled downwards from there. For those of you that have not heard this fact, when Aiden was very little he would cry so hard he'd pass out and stop breathing. Yes pass out. Stop breathing. Gone blue. Scary stuff. Apparently this is typical in 25 percent of kids (according to our Dr) and you are simply supposed to lay them down on a soft surface and ignore it-apparently their body's brain will trigor them into breathing after they pass out and to intervene is to delay their response time in breathing. Thankfully for us this has been something he hasn't done for quite awhile. Until today, at Ann Taylor Loft, in the amazingly stocked clearance section. Lets just say from there I did my best to bring him to a dressing room and calm him, but alas, with cheez its thrown across the floor and clothes half off hangers all over, it was time to give in, call it quits and go home.

As I left I saw the looks of empathy from some women and disdain from other women who had already passed judgement and forgotten what it was like (or never known) to be in those shoes before. By the time I got him into his car seat and into the car John called and I cried. I cried a good twenty minutes home, trying to figure out if there was something wrong with my disciplinary style, my parenting ideas, or maybe even my son because he seemed far more dramatic at his tantrums than other kids his age.....it was just a moment of great confusion, questioning, and wondering if change needed to take place and whether the problem lied in myself, my child or both of us.

On our way home I decided it was a Mc Donald's day. This happens about once every sixth months for us as I am not a big fan, but today was that day. It was also a Dunn Brothers skim mocha ice crema day for me. We went on a good long drive, he watched Ratatouille and giggled and laughed (of course, he was in an excellent mood by then) and I just prayed, calmed down, and looked around for a possible future home for us one day. By the time we got back to the house we were both more relaxed and the caffeine had dulled an oncoming headache down. I was reminded of the advice our Pastor gave John and I when we were under stress years ago...he said "go for a drive, get a burger and a malt, hang out and watch a movie...sometimes, you just need a burger and some ice cream and to get your mind off of stuff." An ice crema was an equally good substitute I must say.

Later on, as I laid my calm, cute baby boy down for his nap I found myself smiling as he held out his hand to me while I was rocking him to sleep asking me to "pway" which means he wants me to pray with him. As I pwayed with him before his nap I began to pray God would help me as a mommy to this specific child, that he would give me wisdom and knowledge of how to guide him and care for him. What to do, not to do, and everything in between. I prayed Aiden would begin to enjoy the benefits of listening to mommy and daddy more, that he would learn to obey and be good when he needed to and to have fun and be at peace. Is that too much for a two year old? Maybe it's a long shot at times, but I know prayer is a good starting point.

I guess for now I'll just keep seeking wisdom from God as my life and my little baby keep changing before my eyes. I thank God whether I know the answers or not, I can always go to Him and pray and seek His wisdom.

James 1:5
If any of you lacks wisdom, you should ask God, who gives generously to all without finding fault, and it will be given to you